Monday, December 27, 2010

Snow is Stupid

Part of me is like a little kid and wants to dive head first into it, worrying about how I will climb out only when my dumb lil kid head has figured out I'm now trapped. The other part of me is an old man who knows full well his landlord has not made paths in the snow to walk at least close to his car so that is added to the job of digging out the car if I actually want to go anywhere. This is the crotchety old "GET OFF MY LAWN" guy I know is inside me, and he hisses at you like Gollum. When it comes down to it, snow is stupid. It's heavy and wet and cold and tastes bad seconds after it lands. It can't fuel cars, perform open heart surgery or even sit in your lap to give you comfort. Snow didn't make even one good movie this year. In a lot of ways, snow is like a really annoying, morbidly obese child. It stares at you from another room, taking up as much space as it can, leaving wet spots as it goes. You try not to make eye contact, because you know you have to move it if you want to do anything good that day.

Snow is stupid. The end.


  1. holy crap! we get 3 inches over in the UK and the country comes to a stand still!

  2. That's why we won our independence! hehehe